Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Three Is Different Than Two

My darling child is constantly growing and changing. But oh, three years old is different than two years old. I hosted a play date for a local moms group on Monday (yesterday) and I was shocked and embarrassed and angered by my son's behavior. He kept loudly announcing that he wanted all the people to go away. And other remarks like that (but meanwhile was having a fabulous time playing with the kids who were here). It was not really until the bike incident that I was super-stressed though. We were all going to go for a walk down to the water and I had allowed him to ride his bike instead of walk. We were all waiting outside the house for one mama to join us. Captain Adorable took off on his bike. I called him back, saying that he had to stay where I could see him. He came back but left again almost immediately. This time he went and went and went. I got kind of scared, and called and called and ran after him (yes, ok, not the best reaction, but my only excuse is that I was already stressed and angered by his various other misbehaviors throughout the morning). He was coming back when I reached him. I took the bike away, reminding him, "When you do not obey, you loose your choices. Now I am making the choice and I choose to take the bike away." I put it in the garage. There was much screaming. And yelling. And crying. I picked him up and walked ahead, trying to get away from the pack, but the only thing that got me was out of breath. I was so embarrassed. I was surprised that his reaction was so violent. I was at a loss for what to do. Next time I will go slower, be less worried about the other moms, and take the time to be calm and firm instead of super excited and firm. I will also not carry him!


mamefati said...

I can so relate, 3 is soooo far from 2!
Approaching 4 and hearing that it gets better around 5, lol!

Kayleigh said...

Don't be embarrassed! Everyone's kid does stuff that makes us cringe, it's part of being little and not having social filters yet.

It has been my experience, both with my own and other people's children, that most kids can't handle larger groups until they are around between 6-8. Once you get more than 3 kids under six together it's just too much.

I know, I know, play groups and preschools are a part of life, but I personally wouldn't seek them out unless I enjoyed being with all the other moms or needed child care.

I think sometimes we go along with the idea that our kids need to be "socialized" when they are waaaay too young to really handle it.

Sounds to me like you handled it all fine -- don't be too hard on yourself or the boy, he sounds like a great kid.